Unconscious Lifting

‘Penis-Handed hitchhiker?’ I drew the picture (a self-portrait?) when I was seven, but have no memory of why I did it, or what the picture was about. It only came to light last year (via my parents - having a clean-out), and even though I hadn’t seen it since the day I drew it, I must – in my unconscious mind, somehow – have recalled it when I did my ‘Lifting’ performance (another self-portrait made on a self-timer), back in 1987.

Of course, I could equally have been drawing a ‘Penis-Handed Gun-Slinger’, in anticipation of my ‘Accidental Shooting’ (made in 1988; see my last blog of the same name): the arrow in my childhood drawing being the natural companion to the mysterious longbow laceration in the film.

But hold on, the drawing’s been torn in half: notice how the ear (my ear?) has been torn - at the exact same spot - I was to tare my own ear, years later. The drawing: did I rip it? The artist, then, anticipating the artist he is now? I don’t know – I’d never heard of Van Gogh and his ear - but I’d like to think so (see how I almost cut-off my ear, in, ‘I’m A Real Artist Now’, 16/1/2011). Here's my ear (now), complete with scar-tissue.